Tuesday, April 9, 2013

4 canadians, 3 brits and a ladyboy

WOOO ASIA
new country, new friends, new crazy atmosphere.

It all started in the singapore airport... I got off the plane, immediately realized I'd left my phone in the seat pocket, and when I tried to get back on I wasn't allowed. They proceeded to "search" for my phone which shockingly they couldn't find. This is the same airline that had no tvs for either of our 7 hour flights, charged money for a glass of water, charged 160$ to check your bag (pleasant surprise), and basically ignored you all flight long if you weren't thai. Never fly jetstar asia. never. I'm fairly confident my phone was sold on ebay to help cover staff wages.

Anyways, just to add insult to injury, this was my birthday. Maybe the worst one ever. When we finally got to Bangkok, Josh told me to wait while he changed. I waited for 35 minutes (no exaggeration, I was sitting under the clock and watching it) wondering where he was. I ended up just leaving, convinced he was abducted or lost. The only place I knew by name was Khoa san road, so I went there.... If you know anything about Khoa san, you'll know it's one of the worst possible places to go when you're scared or confused (both of which I was... mostly scared of Josh's wrath when he found me). There's about one million people on a 20 meter stretch of road, and 1/10 are screaming at you to buy a suit or eat the scorpion they just fried up. The next 2 hours were spent frantically trying to get a hold of josh on the internet, hard without a phone, but even harder when he tried to arrange to meet me at an abandoned restaurant called Mr Yim's. Eventually we did thankfully find each other and booked the first place we ran into. After that we walked around Khoa san for a bit, and even though it's a short road you can walk up and down it for hours because its always changing. We got dinner and  beer for 3$, which was lovely, but Josh also lost 500baht in a bit of a suit scam, which he can tell you about...

The currency here is the baht. 100 baht is about 4$, so we could usually get a room for about 300 baht. Why they choose to work with such a crazy currency I don't know, but it definitely makes you feel rich when you take thousands of baht out of the ATM.

Onwards with our first day... We planned to meet up with our friend from home, MC. We planned to pre with her and then hit skybar. The problem with Thai taxis is that they rarely understand where you're trying to go unless you have the directions written for you in Thai (something we had yet to learn) so the cab driver took us way out of the way and dropped us off.  This was only after he begged us to come to his friend's suit shop. After speaking to the lady at 7/11, we realized we were still 20 minutes away, so we trudged back, found another cab and went home to bed. Once again, this was our 23rd birthday. 

Thankfully things started looking up the next day. Bright and early we met our first friend, Tom. Tom is an animated and hilarious guy from northern England, which basically means his sense of humor is crude and he loves to drink. Tom had gotten to khoa san at 3am the previous morning after getting scammed 2500 baht for his cab from the airport (i paid 350) and he, like us, was extremely rattled by the place. The 3 of us moved to another less crazy place in Bangkok. By that I mean there was still millions of people around you at all times but they weren't shouting at you and pulling at you non stop. On route we ran into his 3 foot woman who kept touching Josh and Tom and licking their sweat off her fingers and then cackling. terrifying woman. The hostel was called smile society and the owner was an absolute gem. There we met up with three of our German friends from Germany: Doris, Ana and Judith. It definitely felt soothing to meet up with people who understood the culture shock of coming from Australia to Bangkok. We also met 4 Brits.. Matt, Matt 2 (aka "the ash man"), Myles and Luke. We walked around a bit and then hit sky bar that night, which is basically a really nice bar on the outdoor patio on the 65th floor. Amazing views but as you can imagine it was insanely overpriced. After one drink we left to find a new place, where it became a game to avoid the cockroaches running all over your feet. 

Myles was a bit obsessed with the concept of lady boys, which are basically really convincing transvestites (look it up), so he dragged us out to find them... We found a place called thigh bar ...... Where inside a few girls were dancing (unconfirmed lady boys) and we had some cheap drinks. I also had my first experience with a squat toilet, which is basically a hole in the ground that you do your business on. In Asia you definitely appreciate western toilets, and when you find one it feels like you hit the lottery as they mostly don't have toilet paper as are usually squatters. You also aren't allowed to flush toilet paper, you have to throw it out... Sooo when you go number two they have a hose in the bathroom that you're supposed to use to clean up. The toilet in this place was literally a hole in the ground with a red plastic seat situated in the strip club's storage room and instead of a door there was a curtain. Not delightful, but at least now I know(hope) I've faced the worst. 

The next day the Germans, Tom, josh and I headed by boat to the grand palace. When we got there we found out it was 300baht to get in, so the boys and I went to an air conditioned cafe to wait for the Germans to see it. After some confusion involving china town on the way home, we treated ourselves to McDonald's and went back to smile society. For dinner all of us including the Brits went out for dinner and had a horrible experience being hated on by the Thai servers. All of the boys and I then started to pre (the Germans bailed) and we all ended up just talking at the table. The Brits dared Matt to break off from their group and come with us, claiming he'd never have the balls to do it. I didn't think he would do it either, but the next morning he announced he was going to come south with us and meet up with them in a day or two. Of course they ended up going north and screwing him for 5 nights, but he's happily on his way to meet them now.

Anyways, after we checked out of smile society we finally met up with Chris and Lindsay (friends from home for those of you who don't know) and that made me and josh incredibly happy. The 4 of us plus Tom and Matt headed to the bus stop, where we waited for 8 hours for our bus... The highlights there included horrible manicures and being forced to stop playing president by security because they insisted we were gambling. 

After that 8 hour wait we were finally getting out of Bangkok. I'm still not sure how I felt about it, but I'm leaning towards saying i strongly disliked it. Too much hustle and bustle, too much mayhem. Don't get me wrong though, very cool atmosphere to be involved in. 

We then faced a 7 hour bus ride which was thankfully air conditioned, followed by a 3 hour ferry which was so awful that I was seriously considering kamikazeeing into the ocean. Thankfully at 11am we arrived at the absolutely beautiful island of Koh Tao and checked into an amazing bungalow at royal resort. Our first way was an easy one at the beach, which was a top 3 beach of this trip. The only problem was that the water was actually too hot. Matt ended up getting fried, and the rest of us got a bit of heat stroke. 

We planned for a big night that night, but Matt was feeling ill and Tom had managed to turn a nap into a sleep for the 3rd night in a row (dreadful habit) so the four of us headed out. Chris had quite a big big night but that is his story to tell. The bar we went to was called castle and they played awesome music. On the walk home Chris taunted every wild dog we passed and I thought he would get us killed but we made it back. The next day was pretty similar in that we hit another beach. We also spent a big portion of the day booking our scuba trip for the next day. The only other activity of the day was eating. 

The next day we all (except josh) got up early to scuba dive. Our instructor was a babe from Switzerland so that was nice. He took us to two sites, Japanese gardens and twin rocks, both for 50 minutes. We saw about a million types of coral and some huge fish called emperors, but he scariest one was the trigger fish. It was my first scuba so initially I was panicking but it ended up being awesome and I wish it could've been for longer. 

That night we had our big big night. We had a fun Predrink then headed down the beach, led by a stray dog we picked up at the hostel. He came all the way with us 3 km down to a place called lotus bar where things got a bit crazy for Matt and Tom.. Matt managed to walk directly through a fire show to puke in the ocean and then back several times... The four of us plus Jess (great friend from NZ that we met up with and are now traveling with) danced and laughed all night about the other two, then walker the long way home at 4am, sadly without our dog friend. 

The next day was equally as exciting. We rented scooters and immediately Jess had a minor crash into the wall that cost her 100$. I climbed on the back of one, too scared to drive, only to crash 5 minutes into the trip on the first turn. Thankfully both me and the driver (identity kept secret to protect the ego) were unscathed, just a little rattled. Mom, do not worry! The crash count remained at 2 for the rest of the day. We drove or scooters to a place called shark island. Sadly I had a mild case of food poisoning so I mostly slept and moped, but everyone else had a great day and most of them saw sharks while they were snorkeling. Bad day to be ill. When we got back to the hostel I think we were all pretty relieved to be ok. We had a group dinner then josh, Jess, Tom and Matt went back to lotus bar. Matt actually stayed up to watch the Manchester game at 2am, what a trooper. 

Today we got back on the scooters, not quite rattled enough to avoid them. We hit some other beach and hung out in the water all day. I also managed to spot a Toronto ultimate disc and stuck up a convo with a weirdo Canadian who now plays in tssc... 

We said out goodbyes to Matt, dealt with the problems with the bikes and now the 6 of us are on a Ferry to koh phangan, which is basically the party island in this area. 

That's all for now..... Thanks for sticking it through this post amigos! Home in one week xoxoxo

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